Friday, November 20th 2009

"With enough courage, you can do without a reputation." -Rhett Butler

I discovered something new about myself! I guess I kind of knew it all along, only it suddenly occurred to me yesterday: I don't like people.

Generally, I don't like people. I find human beings too... meddlesome. Is that the right word? They're so difficult to communicate with, to share things with, and they're never truly happy and satisfied with the people or things around them, or even themselves. It's just so difficult, I think I'd be content talking to animals. I feel fed-up with having to deal with people.

Yesterday had been a very musical day, apart from my hair-cut. I told myself I had to finish the Grade 2 exercises before I moved on to Grade 5 exercises in theory, since I had no knowledge of it whatsoever. I spent hours yesterday doing it, and managed to finish it, too. I guess watching "Amadeus" helped. Like Maths, music is becoming an escape rather than a chore.
I keep feeling the need and urge to study something, anything. I've spent 3 years studying for major exams, and when freedom finally hit me, I went on studying. It's like an addiction. The stress hasn't gone away, my eye bags are getting bigger, but I'm sleeping better nowadays.

Mom and Dad have been giving me hell for the past month or so, quarrelling over their holiday trips to greatly contrasting places. I got caught in the middle, so Dad ended up yelling at me and Mom kept bugging me about going to Dubai and UK.
Dad doesn't like to travel to far-away places, he prefers his hot and humid climate in SEA, while Mom wants to travel all over the world to places like Egypt and Russia and the UK. I'd prefer to go to colder places like Mom's choices, but not with Mom, or with my family. I just want to go alone, to be able to sit by rivers and write, you know, things like that, instead of having to look like a tourist and go to man-made tourist attractions that charge an exorbitant amount of money for entry.

Well, I do benefit from all this. We're going to Phuket this December (Dad's choice),plenty of beautiful beaches and shopping, and the UK+Dubai is pushed to the first quarter of next year.
I'll be going to Scotland, baby!!