I did a study on maggots once.
I tried growing some. I hung a big piece of raw pork in a wire cage from a tree at the field beside my block, but they never came. I mean, there were a couple of flies and lots of ants, but the maggots never came. There were a few eggs, I think, but then somebody cleared the cage off the tree and I never saw it again.
I was doing a study on maggots for my 'O' level Art exam. We were always encouraged to use first-hand sources, instead of copying from photos off the internet. Since my attempt at getting a first-hand source didn't work out, I had to draw the maggots off the internet. However, I did use some first-hand sources, like the pig's heart I bought from the market, dissected and drew.
No, I don't consider myself sick and twisted. I just really like Biology. There are two things I absolutely can't stand; worms and zombies. Both appear in my nightmares often. Both of them just freak me out completely, apart from the other numerous things that freak me out.
I've noticed that more and more things are freaking me out, be it a said thing, a seen thing, a heard thing or a done thing. There are so many now, although I can't seem to list them off the top of my head.
These few days have just been too stressful, with insufficient sleep every night, the dizzying highs and the depressing lows of everyday life, studies, love, family, other general things. I feel myself lagging behind, feeling exhausted, helpless, doubtful. I yearn for the headstrong side of me. Where is it hiding?
Sheer willpower is needed here, to pull me through hell once again.
Why, then, why is it hiding?
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