Sunday, February 28th 2010

For Sabby:
Here's presenting my side of the argument - Philippe Jaroussky does have beautiful eyes!
His are a shade of 'olive drab' green with a golden dust of the sparkle of honey. (Click on photo to view in detail) Could you possibly hope or wish for anything more beautiful? Such a pleasant change from all your blond-haired, blue-eyed people, Sab!

The world is going to the dogs, I tell you. Dogs, cats, rabbits, hamsters! Tsunamis are a-churning, snowstorms covering large areas of land, now the Chile earthquake. Before this, there was Haiti. There wasn't even enough time to recover before the next disaster struck. This is global warming. Warming is extremely accurate, because here in Singapore, it's been getting hotter every day. The heat is getting more unmerciful with each passing day, and it's really starting to bug me.
My country has always been quite hot and humid, but never like this. I'm not worried, though. If it's time to die, it's time to die. I'm ready whenever death decides to take me. Global warming has gotten so bad, I think it's pretty much irreversible. Should there be any survivors, in 50 years' time they'll look back at the time-line and determine when it all started going downhill, how long it took, what finally happened.

Meanwhile, my head is filled with the beautiful melodies of ciaccona pieces, or chaconne, in French. To be honest, I don't quite know if they are labelled 'pieces' or not. Have a listen, the songs that are currently playing on my blog are from the category.
Beautiful, aren't they? Quite delightful with their light, happy melodies. Most of them are from the 17th-18th Century during the Baroque era, it was a popular form of composition back then.

Gotta get back to doing music theory. Perhaps I'll try composing my own pieces after March 13th. I tried it once last year and it was horrible!

Friday, February 26th 2010

I am quite pleased with my day.

I awoke at 9am today feeling really tired. It felt as if I hadn't enough sleep the night before, but had to get up anyway because I was due to meet Kat at City Hall at 11am. It takes about 45 mins to travel there by bus, and I wanted to because it was bloody hot this morning. I couldn't imagine having to tread in the infernal heat of the unrelentingly-scorching sun. Global warming is getting to be a serious threat.
Finally met Kat at City Hall, she wanted to have brunch at the "Pizza Place", but it seemed to be closed for the day, so we ended up at "Din Tai Fung" instead and ordered two large baskets of xiao long bao and a bowl of noodles. After lunch, we headed to Marina Square to settle her shoe-transfer, then to Esplanade library where we attempted (that's right -attempted) to study, Kat with her driving theory and I with my music theory. I managed a few sections of theory before we had to go meet Gervin, so it wasn't entirely wasted.
Went to the epi-centre at Suntec for Kat to enquire about her iTunes giftcard, but they don't sell it here in SG, so we took the MRT to Tanjong Pagar to sign ourselves up at the job agency "Kelly". I don't think they'd have jobs for us since we can only work a very short period of time. I'm just hoping for a temporary job to hold for a week or two so I can earn enough money to buy an iPod Classic. It's so simple: No job, no money, no iPod Classic. I hope the Nike event will occur at the right time. It was pure torture caressing the beautiful iPods at the epi-centre today.
Then, we took the train to 313 at Somerset where Gervin wanted to buy face-masks from a shop called "Nature Republic". They have pretty cool stuff there. We all ended up buying something there. Kat bought face masks and eye-bag masks, Gerv bought face masks and some collagen thingy for her mom, I bought a foot mask (which, by the way, works quite well. I used it just before I came online!). We also had some food at the food-level there, complete with candy-floss-flavoured-ice-cream. Meh, didn't impress me.
Went to HMV after that where I wanted to check out the soundtrack of "What a Girl Wants", which they didn't have. However, I walked into the classical section where I chanced upon the nice guy who works there. He only knows me because I've ordered so many Philippe Jaroussky CDs through him. Anyway, he was kind enough to tell me about the new CD that's going to be released in March this year, and showed me the webpage and CD info. I've posted the cover picture at the start of this post. It's called "Via Crucis" which translates to something like 'stations of the cross'.
I recognised some of the tracks on the list, but have never heard the polished, studio-recorded versions. The ones I've heard are beautiful. Again, we have works by composers like Monteverdi, Merula and Ferrari. We also have familiar-named tracks like "Ciaccona di Paradiso e dell'Inferno", although I'm not sure it's the exact one I've already heard. So, anyway, HMV nice guy is helping me to order a copy, but it's not till end-March. Excited, though! Always excited about getting more good music.

Wednesday, February 24th 2010

I tried out my new shoes jogging today, they were awesome!
What I love about them is the arch support. They have adequate ankle support, good enough. I couldn't find the exact colour of the shoes online, so I've posted a close second. Mine has a bit of light blue and shades of grey on it. Quite pretty, it's a slightly cheaper version of the pair of shoes Kat wants. The ones she's lusting after are in black and neon green/yellow. Ugh, I'm not into neon colours but I have to say, they aren't that bad. As long as she likes them...
I bought mine with Kat last week, it's the first time I bought a pair of running shoes without my parents around. It felt so unreal just walking into the shop at Raffles City and trying on several shoes and sizes before I finally said, "hey, I'm going with this one," like it was the easiest thing in the world. I'm so lucky.

I also forgot to type about my day out with my dear Sabby. It was last Saturday, I think, and she just suddenly suggested that we go to Uncle Ringo's amusement park near Esplanade. It wasn't much, but they had enough rides. We took many photos, too. Damn, do you know how much it cost us for 4 rides?! Close to $30! It was ridiculous, but what the hell, I don't get to see Sab often, so we went mad anyway. Sab chickened out on our last major ride, though. It was one of those hang-upside-down-in-mid-air things where people scream their heads off. Too bad, because it would've been really fun. :)
After that, we had cake at Secret Recipe and took more photos, and then went shopping. The motion-sickness didn't wear off until we went shopping, so luckily they didn't have my "moist-chocolate cake with liquid fudge" in stock. I managed to buy a couple of plain long-sleeved T-shirts for my upcoming life in Poly. I plan to paint on them, I wish they came in a higher quality but hey, this is Singapore, and I'm poor.

Meeting Kat bright and early tomorrow morning. We're taking a bus to Temasek Poly where we're meeting Gervin after her last exam. She's supposed to show us around the school, I made a mental note just now to not dress dowdily tomorrow. I can't bear looking like an idiot in a cool environment around cool people.
We're all going to Marina Square (Kat needs to do something there) and then grab lunch, then off to SPCA and maybe Serangoon North. It seems these girls have become a little obsessed with cute little furry animals, and I'm always glad to see some. My lovely Rabbit lives in every one of them.
I miss him dearly every day.

Tuesday, February 23rd 2010

I am suddenly obsessed with going to a good university after Poly.
I don't know why I'm so fixated on the idea, I think I have this growing fear that I'll end up at some unknown, unheard-of university that will generate replies of "Ohh... I see" from people who ask. I haven't even begun Poly yet, but there is an up-side to this planning ahead. I guess it helps me to have an aim of what I want to achieve, you know, a goal to work towards to, to be the driving force of motivation, to keep me working.

I have heard so many stories of people who end up at unknown or non-reputable institutions and I'm afraid, I'm one of those people who reply "Ohh... I see", but truly, sorry to say, they deserve every bit of it. They take education for granted and they use money to buy their way anywhere, not to mention they are awful, unscrupulous characters without so much as a kind thought for anyone or anything else.
Well, there's that type, and then there's the "I really can't be bothered" type which I also can't stand. I mean, life's here in front of you, go discover something! Some of my friends are this type, it's disappointing but there's no way to force someone to change. Like I've said countless times before, there's never a way of forcing someone to change. The only way they're going to learn is through self-experience. I'm in every position to say so.

The first photo is of Trinity College, Dublin, Ireland. It's a beautiful place, and it's the best in Ireland. It's also where Oscar Wilde went. I didn't think much of it when I read about it, but when I saw photos, I was hooked. Just look at the place! It's so beautiful, so poetic, the contrast of colours is so great, yet they go so well together in a well-set ensemble. They have a medical school, though perhaps not as reputable as Edinburgh's, but still not bad.
The second photo is of the University of Edinburgh. Don't be fooled, this is only the students' quarters, I think. Their medical school is superb, and it's the dream, isn't it, for every medical student. I have considered Oxford and Cambridge, but I highly doubt it. I'll think about it further in my 3rd year of Poly, when I look back on my GPA. If I don't get a 4.0, there's no way in hell I'm going to get any kind of university scholarship, let alone go to Oxbridge.
4.0 isn't impossible. There is a bit of a loophole of some sort. I don't have to get an 'A+' in every subject, I can just get 'A', which would still guarantee me a 4.0. I'm still going to try to get 'A+'s, though, from experience, one can never be too optimistic.

Other than those two universities, I've also considered the Royal College of Surgeons of Edinburgh/Ireland/England which, fortunately, are 3 different institutions. They specialise in surgery training. I've also listed the University of Birmingham Medical School and the University of Auckland. However, Uni of Edinburgh remains at the top of my list as it is the most prestigious, though also undoubtedly the most difficult to enter.
Besides getting into a good university, my other main aim is just to get far, far away from here and all these people. I want a new adventure, a different group of people with a different culture, a less-rude society, even if it means they also drink a lot more alcohol. I want to study in beautiful 18th-century libraries and sit at ruin-sites to write poetry and sketch and maybe even have lunch. It's just not going to happen here.

Maybe that's why I can't wait to go.

Friday, February 19th 2010

There's something very addictive about this show.

I've been watching it for about 2 months now and I love every moment. Most of the men who go home to find their women in the house with a hunk didn't seem very happy, but who cares! I think the only reason I even watch the show is for Curtis Stone and his food. He makes cooking look so easy, and it doesn't hurt that he's cute, too. He's attractive, and he's a great cook. It's incredibly sexy.
What more could you want in a man?!

Thursday, February 18th 2010

Well, I had a pretty darn good day.

1) My rashes have gone down significantly, thanks to the wonderful Calamine Lotion. It works like magic!
2) I had a good voice lesson this morning. Worked on "Le Violette", and mostly technical details and lifting the tongue dorsum. Left feeling quite happy with myself, because for some strange reason, my cold from 2 days ago has completely disappeared and left my voice sounding really good. Crisp and clear.
3) Met up with Kat this afternoon, she had her fringe cut (although it doesn't look any different) and I bought a pair of Nike running shoes that cost a bomb. I've been considering buying new running shoes for 2 years now, and since I had $40 worth of vouchers, I finally decided to get a pair since my old pair's (3-years old) ankle support has collapsed. After that, we took the MRT down to Orchard, where we gaped at the many beautiful books at Kinokuniya and talked about Philosophy and literature. Man, I felt so small standing beside her, usually people I know haven't the faintest idea about poetry, philosophy, literature. Who am I kidding? They don't even read!
Yet, there she was, going on and on about philosophy and stuff. Mannnnn, but it was really fun talking to her. It's always great to converse at a higher level sometimes. I also bought THREE Oscar Wilde books!!!!! Very happy about that. It wasn't planned, but I decided to spoil myself since it was for "educational" reasons. One book's on his fairy tales, another's on his poetry, the last is on his 'wit and humour', full of quotes.

[Note to self: read up on philosophy and hurry up with Dorian Gray!]

Tuesday, February 16th 2010 (to 17th)

I feel like I'm dying.

I've come down with another rash, and it kept me from falling asleep, so here I am at 2.41am.
I thought it was due to some insect bites at first, because they look like mosquito bites, but my sis suggested it's a heat rash, which is another plausible explanation since I spent most of the 8-hour car journey sitting or lying at the back of the car. The rash is concentrated at major heat areas- back of the neck, back and front of torso and behind my knees at the bendy joint.

It would be easier for me to stay awake all through the night than try desperately to fall asleep. Calamine lotion didn't work very well, so going to see the doctor tomorrow morning. I actually scheduled a voice lesson at 10.30 tomorrow morning but have cancelled it due to this damned rash. I hope the teacher isn't pissed off. I had it all planned- to sneak out while Dad was out sending my sis to work, so I wouldn't have to argue with him about having a voice lesson. After my voice lesson I would go to Kinokuniya to look for more works by Oscar Wilde. Poetry? Plays? Autobiography, perhaps?

Sleep had been inconsistent over the past few nights in M'sia. Kept dreaming about receiving my enrolment package and starting school and buying my laptop. My sis just got an Apple Macbook as a gift, but don't feel that bad because I'll be getting my own gadgets. All in good time, my dear Xiulin. I wish I don't have to take the stupid music theory exam. I feel so unprepared for it, and it's a month away!
No, I'll get through it somehow. I've done so many things I never thought I could do, nothing is impossible anymore. I'll get at least a pass on the exam. I'll get through this rash, I'll get through my insomnia, I'll get through the challenges of poly and work to enter medical school. Somehow.

12th February 2010 midnight

As the days pass, I find myself increasingly drawn to Oscar Wilde. I admire him for his courage, his proud and charming character. He faced up to what he was, who he was even when society was so unhappy, it deemed him guilty of a non-crime, and he did not flee the country even when they were hunting him down for incarceration.
He was confident, a wordy man with much to reason with. Although he couldn't convince society about free love, he didn't buckle under the pressure of being different. In short, he is absolutely awesome, and is quickly becoming one of my idols, my role-models. He's the perfect example.
I shall, in time, teach myself to speak and write like him. It's quite a pity he died more than a hundred years ago, but it's a beautiful thought to think that all the great people once inhabited the same Earth as I.

We share our home and when we die, we change it and leave a piece of us behind.

Thursday, February 11th 2010

Well, well! I can't believe I forgot to mention that I've passed the 500-post mark weeks ago. It is kind of impressive that I've been sticking to this blog for about 6 years now. I'll kill whoever tries to re-set the internet, I tell you.

Met up with Gerv, Kat and Sijia today for pizza at "The Pizza Place" at lunch-time, then hung out at Starbucks and Suntec till about 6pm. Sijia had to leave earlier to meet her mom, so the rest of us went to the pet-shop at Suntec and melted over the beautiful, fluffily sweet bunnies (and other things). Gerv is really into hamsters now because she just got two, but I was mostly interested in the rabbits. Needless to say, they reminded me of my own lovely Rabbit. I miss him every day.

Dreading tomorrow, gotta wake up early, only to be faced with the horrible, incredibly suffocating 8-hour car-ride to the far side of Malaysia. I've stocked up on entertainment for the journey and few boring days. I've packed books; science books, novels, classics, a theory workbook, an English dictionary. I've also packed my foolscap paper and pencil-case.
I'd die without my dictionary.

I've also uploaded the film "Wilde" on Oscar Wilde's life, which I haven't watched. My player is quickly running out of space. If Kat can get me that job alongside hers, then I'd finally be able to afford my voice lessons (as opposed to having to ask my parents for help and having to quarrel each time) and buy an iPod Classic that I so deserve. The last gadget I got was my phone 2 years ago when my previous one died. I just can't understand why my parents are so unhappy about my going for voice lessons, it's always so bloody difficult. At least if I can pay for my own lessons, they can't argue much since I earned the money myself.

Let's hope people are less stingy with their ang pows this year.

Tuesday, February 9th 2010

DORIAN GRAY IS GETTING MARRIED!!!

Or so I've read. I didn't get a chance to get any further than the part where he sent a telegram bearing the news that he was going to get married. Damn. I really should hurry up and read the whole story. It's just so difficult to stay on track, you know? It's nothing like what you read by modern authors.

Met up with my old pal Brendy yesterday. We used to be labelled the "partners-in-crime", we stuck together at school and at CCA and after school, kind of grew up together but we went to different Secondary schools. We hung out a bit in Sec 1 but that was it, so yesterday's meeting was the first in 5 or 6 years.
It was great. We hung out and just talked, and then had a dinner of finger-food (Old Chang Kee...) and ended up sky-gazing at the big car-park near my home. Took a couple of photos before my camera died, too. Damn, I wish I had recharged the battery and not taken those lousy two bars for granted. It felt really good to see her again, even though I know we'll never be as close as we once were, again. Well, we're meeting up again in March after my theory exam, so all looks well.

Naz is coming over in about 20 minutes to see my notice-boards. Actually, I'm making her. Ha, ha. I just want her to know that as long as she wants something, she can conquer anything in the way. She's a sweet kid, she doesn't see how talented she is.
How do you tell someone that?

Going to see "The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus" this morning, I'm pumped on upbeat music like "Walking on Sunshine" and dancing around the house like a crazy person since nobody's home. Plus, I haven't been able to get a wink of sleep for the past 3 nights so I have this unrelenting dull headache and my expression is a bit stoned. However, I've been out of bed since 7am this morning in the hope of escaping the excruciating torment of my sleeplessness.
Talk about sleeplessness giving you the power of comprehensive vocabulary!

Saturday, February 6th 2010

Oscar Wilde was a literary genius. Dorian Gray kept me from sleep last night, and I was still lying awake at 3am. It's getting ridiculous. I haven't been able to sleep since I started reading "The Picture of Dorian Gray".
I can't put my finger on why I'm so obsessed with it. It is beautifully written, but I have gone no further than chapter 4. It's eating into me.
It's similar in some ways to the story I wrote about Lune and the artist. The artist falls in love with his painting, but in mine, Lune isn't actually alive.

I found some bits from his book that I have the compulsion to share.

"Crudely as it had been told to him, it had yet stirred him by its suggestion of a strange, almost modern romance. A beautiful woman risking everything for a mad passion. A few wild weeks of happiness cut short by a hideous, treacherous crime. Months of voiceless agony, and then a child born in pain. The mother snatched away by death, the boy left to solitude and the tyranny of an old and loveless man. Yes; it was an interesting background. It posed the lad, made him more perfect as it were. Behind every exquisite thing that existed, there was something tragic.... And how charming he had been at dinner the night before, as, with startled eyes and lips parted in frightened pleasure, he sat opposite to him at the club, the red candleshades staining to a richer rose the wakening wonder of his face. Talking to him was like playing upon an exquisite violin. He answered to every touch and thrill of the bow.... There was something terribly enthralling in the exercise of influence."

"Grace was his, and the white purity of boyhood, and beauty such as old Greek marbles kept for us. There was nothing that one could not do with him. He could be made a Titan or a toy. What a pity it was that such beauty was destined to fade!"

" "Yes," he continued, "that is one of the great secrets of life. Nowadays most people die of a sort of creeping common sense, and discover when it is too late that the only things one never regrets are one's mistakes." "

"It was an extraordinary improvisation. He felt that the eyes of Dorian Gray were fixed on him, and the consciousness that amongst his audience there was one whose temperament he wished to fascinate, seemed to give his wit keenness, and to lend colour to his imagination."
"Dorian Gray never took his gaze off him, but sat like one under a spell, smiles chasing each other over his lips, and wonder growing grave in his darkening eyes."

Friday, February 5th 2010

I finally created my "study-blog" today. Here's the link: http://awesomeiq.blogspot.com/

I thought it would be cool to document my entire experience in Poly, starting at the very beginning. It's a good way to keep track of my progress throughout, and I intend to type about my days, the people I meet there, and of course, the assignments and my thoughts. At the end of 3 years, I could read the entries and look back at who I used to be. It would also be a good way to help me remember what I've learnt, you know, because I'll be typing it again.

Of course, I'll be juggling a lot of things. In addition to my study-blog, I have my main blog to update, and cope with my studies, CCA, voice lessons, and perhaps a part-time job or volunteer work that would help me enter University. All this and my social life. I do believe it's possible, as difficult as it sounds.
At least even if I end up insane, I'll be oblivious to that fact.

I chose a short music playlist for my new blog, taking care to put in only upbeat and positive-sounding songs. Top song at the moment is Mika's "We Are Golden". I have watched the video, and yes, I act like that sometimes, in my room or around the house when nobody's at home. -shifty eyes-
I like that song because it's so upbeat, so confident, with strong lyrics that express my thoughts so accurately. It's true. We don't live for people. We awake at noon. We act crazy as hell. We have the most dreams in life.
I prefer the acoustic version, though. It's not so forceful throughout, there's more thought and soul in it.

Did another IQ test today and came through with a score of 131!
Read about the little boy who did well in "A" level-standard-exams, and who's going to NUS to study Medicine. The poor boy is only 13. Clever he may be, but he has learnt nothing.
I'd rather stick to who I am, at least I have the scars and knowledge to show for it. Wisdom doesn't just come overnight, you know. ;)

Thursday, February 4th 2010

Yesterday, I finally got down to reading Oscar Wilde's "The Picture of Dorian Gray".

It seemed quite tiresome at first, I had to get through the introduction and preface. When I eventually made it to the first chapter, it didn't leave any impression on me yet. It was only until I continued reading it last night in bed then I realised it's a beautiful story.

Oscar Wilde only ever published one novel, and here it is. Sure, there were plenty of (one might even say too many) adjectives that, I've discovered, causes the human mind to fix its attention elsewhere, so it's a challenge to stay focused and keep reading. It's going to be a slow read.
I haven't gotten far into the book yet, I just started Chapter 2 last night. Here's a quote from the book.

" "Tell me more about Mr. Dorian Gray. How often do you see him?"
"Every day. I couldn't be happy if I didn't see him every day. He is absolutely necessary to me."
"How extraordinary! I thought you would never care for anything but your art."
"He is all my art to me now," said the painter, gravely. "I sometimes think, Harry, there are only two eras of any importance in the world's history. The first is the appearance of a new medium for art, and the second is the appearance of a new personality for art also. What the invention of oil-painting was to the Venetians, the face of Antinous was to late Greek sculpture, and the face of Dorian Gray will some day be to me. It is not merely that I paint from him, draw from him, sketch from him. Of course I have done all that. But he is much more to me than a model or a sitter. I won't tell you that I am dissatisfied with what I have done of him, or that his beauty is such that Art cannot express it. There is nothing that Art cannot express, and I know that the work I have done, since I met Dorian Gray, is good work, is the best work of my life." "

Wednesday, February 3rd 2010

I have been obsessed with IQ tests lately. I always wanted to take them but was afraid of the results, you know, in case they have a drastic impact on my ego. However, I forced myself to take several and came through with a score of 123. It's not a genius score (Einstein got 160), but it's above average and considered good.

I guess I've always known myself to be somewhat quite clever, I know that the potential for success is there, but sometimes it just doesn't show. Either that or sometimes I just can't be bothered to try. It used to be the latter for most of my Primary school life, and perhaps the first two years of Secondary school. At least I know now that I'm actually cut out for greater things than a lousy dead-end 9-5 job in an office cubicle with asshole colleagues and boss.
Good to know, because I don't intend to end up like that anyway, it's too stupid a way of wasting my life. I'd rather work in a bakery!

Always strive to do better.

Monday, February 1st 2010

A few days ago I remembered that V and I had discussed Mika. She bought his album a few months back and I was to borrow it later. Anyway, we thought Mika too colourful a character to be completely straight. Yesterday or so, I went to listen to some of his songs online, and they were pretty good. I like the strong lyrics and expression of freedom.
I went on Wikipedia to find out more, and apparently, a lot of people have wondered about his sexual orientation because of his "flamboyant stage persona". However, I came across a few things he said (and that were quoted later) that I want to share with you guys.

He said that "there is a way of discussing sexuality without using labels", "I've never labelled myself...You should be as free as you want."
Now that, I totally agree with. It's a kind of freedom most people deny themselves, they feel the need to categorise themselves as "straight" or "gay" or other things inbetween. I mean, if you love someone, you love someone. It doesn't matter if it's a "he" or "she" or even an "it".
Love should never be forbidden.